How Can I Help?
Do
Do: Assure confidentiality, let the victim know if you must report
Do: Be understanding, non-blaming, honest, and supportive
Do: Listen and validate feelings
Do: Acknowledge the abuse, show concern
Do: Ask questions, help victim to identify abusive behaviors
Do: Remind them of their strengths, compliment them
Do: Assess for danger
Do: Express concern
Do: Offer help, refer to school social worker, guidance, administrator
Do: Share information about dynamics of abusive relationships
Do: Support their decisions, be patient, and offer support for as long as it takes
Do: Provide information:- National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE
- National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline 1-866-331-9474
- Your State Coalition Against Domestic Violence can be found at: http://www.ncadv.org/resources/StateCoalitionList_73.html
- Safety plans
- Legal information
Do: Remember that the most dangerous time for a victim is right after they leave the relationship; the victim needs to have a safety plan
Don’t
Don’t:* Judge or blame
Don’t: Talk to victim & abuser together
Don’t: Pressure
Don’t: Place conditions on your support
Don’t: Assume victim wants to leave relationship
Don’t: Put down the abuser
Adapted from www.opdv.state.ny.us, www.safehome-ks.org, “Domestic Violence: The Facts”, and “Mass. Guidelines for Schools on Addressing Teen Dating Violence”
Download How Can I Help Handout (Word Document)
Teen Dating Violence
Dating violence, like domestic violence, is a pattern of controlling, and abusive behaviors of one person over another within a romantic relationship. It can include verbal, emotional, physical, sexual, and financial abuse. It can occur in both heterosexual and homosexual relationships. It knows no boundaries and crosses all lines of race, socio-economic status, etc.
It CAN happen to ANYONE.